Mediocre mom

   As I sip my Earl Grey tea and attempt to get some computer work done, my kids sit at the table with me painting pictures. It's not typically this tranquil. I'm usually a mess of yelling, scrambling, and fretting. Bills are past due, funds are unavailable, and here I am, just trying to make it through the day without cleaning up more than usual. But they wanted to paint, so... paint it is. Whatever keeps them occupied. I feel a tad guilty that I'm lacking the enthusiasm to engage in a more physical activity with them. A mix of anxiety, depression, hypothyroid, and the side effects of the medications I take for them have dulled my passion for even the most basic of things. The attention to my hobbies has dwindled to a distant memory. I can't remember the last time I was inspired to draw of my own volition without prompt or purpose.
    Day after day, week after week, month after month... time drudges on and I survive. It's ok to accept being a mediocre mom. The kids are fed, clothed, and loved. As long as they're happy, I'm doing my best.

Happy little seedlings

Planting day

This is how things began. I gathered what containers I had handy (plants aren't picky, right?). I found all the seeds I've collected over time that I kept telling myself I'd plant a garden at some point. The kids helped me sow them into the various pots and we waited. My kids have no patience when it comes to much of anything, go figure. Iceberg lettuce, buttercrunch, bunch onions, strawberries, zucchini, peppers, and roma tomatoes. My green goddess friend brought me a  starts for grape tomatoes, Chinese cucumbers, and a few others.

 

 

 

 

 

We determined that my front yard might be best suited for growing, I'm just not sure how I'm going to go about it yet. It already has wild strawberries, mockberries, plantain, and other native species. The yard isn't treated with any chemicals, which means I don't have to worry about any of that being an issue. There is the question of ants, chipmunks, and squirrels so I'm doing research into natural forms of deterrents to assure that my harvest isn't eaten by wildlife. The predatory birds in my area will be a great ally for such.

 

 

 

 

One week later

Planting the seeds of growth

I have thus begun my gardening journey/therapy. The plan? Well, I don't really have one. This is going to be all trial and error. Just putting plants in the ground and see what happens. Letting nature take it's course, so to speak. After a visit from an awesome friend and getting her input, I think I'll end up being one of those people that grows food, not grass, in their yards. Hopefully, this new hobby will help get me back on a more productive path and give me a means to feel better about my accomplishments.